5 realistic tips on how to survive the sleepless nights

Sleep becomes like gold dust when you're a new mummy, and every baby is different. The worst part about it all is you can't predict how your baby is going to sleep or when they'll sleep through. My first was an amazing little sleeper, my second less so! The picture below is her at 4am this morning! (sorry it's a little fuzzy!)

These tips aren't how to get your baby to sleep, as every baby is different and I don't think I could put that into 5 tips. Also with my youngest baby still waking every hour, I don't think I am in any way, shape or form, in a position to advise others on getting babies to sleep to sleep through as I've yet to discover the secret with my second myself. These tips are ways to make the sleepless nights a little bit less painful!

1. Set your expectations

When I was pregnant everyone told me that my baby would probably sleep through by 3 months. I stupidly believed them.. I was totally naïve; I knew the night feeds would be difficult, but I had no idea how long they could last. I know some mummies whose little ones have only just started sleeping through at 3. If you're pregnant and reading this, I'm not saying this to put you off, just to prepare you. My first did sleep through at around 6 months and I had no idea how lucky I was to have such a sleep-loving baby!

I wish I had assumed it would take a long time for my second one to sleep through, then maybe it wouldn't have been such a difficult realisation when she didn't. At almost 9 months, she still wakes hourly!

2. Food and drinks!

A packet of biscuits or something nice to nibble on whilst your feeding (grapes, a banana or something healthy when I finally start my diet) are lifesavers in the night. Alongside a nice drink, either a cold glass of water or maybe even a flask of tea (probably best that it's decaf as you wouldn't want a caffeine rush at 3am) can make getting up a little bit easier. Also if you're still breastfeeding you'll probably find that you're waking up starving and thirsty, especially in the early days, so having a little stash of snacks is a lifesaver in the early hours of the morning.

3. Take one day at a time

When your little one is wide awake at 2am and you've managed about 2 hours sleep (because if like me you stay up folding clothes, moving clutter from one room to another and trying to catch up on the soaps) the world seems like a rubbish place, but taking one day at a time can really help, even taking one feed at a time. As soon as your little one is back asleep, try to get back to sleep yourself. Every night is different and even a small improvement of your baby going an extra 30 minutes between feeds or your baby waking for cuddles is an extra 30 minutes sleep for you. Taking it one day at a time has got us to almost 9 months so far, and I haven't got completely crazy yet... yet.

4. Keep them close

We still have the cot in our bedroom although she did briefly go into her nursery for a month or two. My first was an amazing little sleeper and outgrew his moses basket at 4 months, and we couldn't fit the cot in the bedroom in the little flat we used to have, so he was in his nursery from 4 months. He was such a good sleeper that this wasn't a problem. My little girl however didn't take to the move into her nursery very well at all so she's back in the bedroom with us. It's a thousand times easier for me to just get up, sit on the edge of the bed and sort her out from there, rather than wandering down the landing, half asleep, freezing and in a bad mood.

The closer the better and the closer, the easier it is. Besides, mummy cuddles solve most things and often your baby may just want to be close to you.

5. Sleep when you can

If your baby is asleep and you are able to go to sleep to - sleep! If this baby is your first, sleep as much as you can.

Those with other children probably scoff at the whole 'sleep when you can' tip is said. I wanted to cry at the midwife when she suggested this. As much as my eldest is a good sleeper, his is hyperactive during the day so this just doesn't happen. However if you are lucky enough to have a lovely husband, mum, or any family member or friend who is willing to look after your children for you to get a nap, do it! In the early days even an extra hour can make sure a difference to the night and makes it so much easier if you aren't already exhausted!

 

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Here I go with that 4 word phrase that I hate to hear - It will get better! I found this the most infuriating phrase ever up until recently as at the time it's not very helpful. But it will and the sleepless nights aren't forever, although it may seem that at the time. Your body does adjust, and there's always the coffee in the morning to look forward too!

Let me know what tips you have for other mummies (and me!) on how to get through the sleepless nights and what else worked for you.
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How I convinced my husband we should cloth bum!

I have always loved the idea of using cloth nappies. My husband, however, has not. We've been using cloth nappies for over 5 months now, and even now if I'm out of the house, he sneaks her back into disposables. He's come up with a stream of reasons that he doesn't really like to use them, all of which I understand. But I was very determined to use them, and seeing as I do 80% of the nappy changes I stood my ground. He will thank me one day ;) Below are a list of his 'excuses' and my responses...

"They cost an absolute fortune!"
When you consider how long you need to use nappies for (24 months at least normally) you do save money in the long run. The initial start up cost is a definite downside to cloth nappies but it does pay off as you save A LOT of money. If you look after your nappies well, you can also use them beyond one child and continue to use them for subsequent babies (there's a good reason to build a lovely large stash)

It is 100% cost effective... Unless like me, you become a cloth nappy addict. I swear he doesn't even know about half of our stash... I am slowly adding them so he doesn't realise. I've heard of other mummies telling their husbands/partners that they won them in giveaways etc as well. Genius!!

"I don't want to deal with the poop"
It's just poop. And we own soap. When our first was a couple of months old.. He projectile pooped. Everywhere. All over me and my husband. We were speechless but poop is inevitable with babies, whether you use cloth nappies or disposables, and I guarantee as a parent you will get pooped on a number of times during the nappy years... and possibly beyond!

My husband is a bit of a poo-aphobe and really didn't like the idea of having to 'deal' with the poo. So we compromised. We have two nappy pails, one for nappies that need a rinse, and the one for pre-rinsed 'ready for the wash nappies'. So now he has no excuse HA!

"What if I'm out and she poops everywhere... I can't bin the nappy and I don't want to carry that around"

This phased me at first as well. It took my a while to get a good 'system' going, so we kept emergency disposables in the changing bag for a while. We do now carry two wet bags, one for nappies and one for clothes (this one came with the changing bag) to make things easier. And I can 100% confirm that carrying a poop filled cloth nappy is no different to poop covered clothes that have been exploded on. You can wrap them up and put them in the wet bag as you would with soiled clothes, take home, wash and go again! The wet bags can be washed too and if you have a good wet bag, they don't smell and you wouldn't notice any difference (that's wee and poo included).

"I work up to 60 hours some weeks, I can't bothered dealing with them after a long shift at work. Disposables are easier"

There really isn't much difference (especially now we have our 'still to rinse' bucket). It the same quick change as we mostly use all-in-ones, and all he has to do is put the dirty nappy in the bucket. There is equally as much effort in changing a disposable! Besides, I change the nappies most of the time anyway. Since buying lots of lovely prints - I actually enjoy it!

"It's too much washing"

Honestly, when my husband said this, my response was "you never touch the washing machine anyway". He doesn't. The last time he did the washing I was in hospital with severe morning sickness, I was there for two days and he managed to ruin 3 of my favourite tops by mixing the washing...

In terms of how much extra you wash, it really isn't that much. I wash twice a week and it's literally just a case of chucking of them in the washing machine and hanging them up to dry. Which I love, as I get to show the nappies off on the airer... sad I know.

We now use cloth nappies 90% of the time. I'm still working on him! We will get there! I'm a stubborn mummy and determined on using them all the time.
Let me know what your husbands and partners think of them and how or even if you had to convince them to use the cloth.
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5 realistic ways to save your sanity in the early days

When it comes to babies, everyone is quick to jump on you with their well meant advice, on absolutely everything, what you should and shouldn't be doing, sleep to food and everything in between! If you're anything like me, you'll have automatically tuned out when the words 'If I was you' or 'I think you should' are uttered.

Parenting is hard. The hardest thing I've ever done in fact, and one of the biggest things that I have learnt is that every parent is different. What might work for you, may be another parents nightmare, so taking others advice all the time isn't always the best idea. Learning what works for you and your baby is a big part of this journey.

These are my realistic top tips for staying sane during the infamous 'fourth trimester' ... and of course beyond. Not so much advice and what you should be doing for your baby, but tips on how to 'save you sanity', after all learning what your baby needs and getting into your own routine is all part of the fun. Hopefully these tips help you along the way.

1. Remember to eat
It's difficult to get back into any sort of routine when you're so focused on your new little one. With feeds, changing bottoms and attempting to keep the house moderately clean it can be really easy to forget to eat properly. I remember my midwife telling me "don't forget to eat" and I thought what a silly thing to say, but she was so right. I got to a point where I was only just getting two small meals a day and as a result, my supply dropped and I just became so drained. Always try to eat your three meals and snacks, especially if you're breastfeeding. My husband used to work evening shifts, so I used to turn up at my mums, baby and toddler in tow, on days I couldn't be bothered to cook and she'd cook us all a nice hot dinner while we relaxed in the living room (definite pro of having a new baby, she wouldn't do it now! haha)

2. Sleep when you can
Everyone kept telling me 'sleep when the baby sleeps' which if like me, this isn't your first child, is the most annoying nugget of advice ever! As soon as I got my newborn down for a nap, my 3 year old would have a line of activities ready for some quality time (which was lovely, don't get me wrong), so sleeping when my baby slept DEFINITELY wasn't an option. If this is your first baby sleep peacefully in the knowledge it isn't like this next time!

In the end I started to sleep where I could. If my husband wasn't doing overtime, I'd go get an hour or so nap or even at 7am when the kids went to bed, I'd go too. At first this seemed to ridiculous to me, as I wanted some sort of me-time, but when you think about it, catching up with the soaps or your favourite TV show can wait, sleep is important and any chance you get, get as much as you can!

3. Go to baby groups
Having a baby can make you feel really isolated, especially in the week when all your friends and family are at work, so going to your local baby groups can be a really good way to not only pass time but meet some other mothers in the same position as you. It can be nice to go to a weekly group and have something to look forward to or somewhere you can go and have an adult conversation. It's also gives you a good excuse to get out of the house and get some fresh air.

4. Accept as much, or as little, help as you want
I'm quite a stubborn mummy and like to do as much as I can on my own, much to my husbands annoyance, but I wish I had accepted some more help off my family, when having both my babies. Even if it's your great aunt popping round to do a load of washing for you, or your mum coming to wash the dishes, or if you're incredibly lucky, a friend coming to take baby for a walk in their pram, allowing you to get a nap, take it! Most of the people offering you help, have probably been through it and will understand how tiring a new baby can be, so don't feel guilty when they offer help.

5. Try to have some sort of me time, daily
My little girl is a very difficult baby. We've had problems from the start with a number of things including acid reflux, so she wouldn't allow you to put her down for more than 10 minutes before screaming the house down. But, if I was lucky, she'd sit in her chair for 10 minutes happily, which allowed me just to get a shower. For months, that was my only me time, if that. I had quickly mastered a 2 minute rinse and wash, to get out before she had a meltdown.

If you're lucky enough to have a good napper, maybe pick up a hobby, read a book or watch something on TV. Having a little bit of me time can make you feel human again and make you feel refreshed.

It will get better! If you're pregnant or have just had your little one you've probably heard 'they'll be grown up before you know it' a million times already, and I hate to jump on the bandwagon... but it's so true! The first few months last only that, a couple of months, so don't worry about anything else other than you and your baby. Our first few months consisted solely of just surviving. My house was a mess (and still is thanks to my lovely hyperactive kiddies) but it's fine, as cleaning can wait. Enjoy your baby and make the most of every minute.

I hope this helps new mamas :) leave a comment on any other tips on the early days, if you have any and let me know what helped you.
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Reusable Kitchen Towel

A couple of weeks back I accidentally came across a blog about reusable kitchen towel on my Pinterest. We've been making the move to all things reusable (as much as possible and as much as I convince the husband) over the past few months, and I just think this is a brilliant idea! If you're like me, kitchen towel is pretty much just for mopping up children's spillages, and we seem to spend an absolute fortune on the stuff, just for it to go in the bin!

It took me a while to think of a material that was suitable for this and that I could buy in my local shops. In the end I found some lovely polka dot materials in my local fabric store for around £2-3 a metre and some of the wilkos value hand towels for £1 in my local Wilkinson's store which are perfect! The hand towels cut into 6 equal squares, and then I just cut out the same size square from my patterned fabric. You could just use 2 layers of towel but I wanted them to match my kitchen and to stand out from the other face towels I have for the kids (they're incredibly messy eaters!). The kitchen towels that I've made look like this...

I have found a few different tutorials which give lots of information and pictures showing how to make these. The one below is pretty much exactly what I did for mine, I've just not got around to adding the snaps!

http://thatshortgirlsblog.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/reusable-paper-towel-tutorial.html

This tutorial is also brilliant as she has also added a tube with snaps for the inside, which is a such a good idea, because rolling these up neatly is difficult!

http://cateyedkp.tumblr.com/post/28130255598/unpaper-towel-tutorial

And for those without a sewing machine here is tutorial for hand sewn ones! This is packed full with information, so even if you're no good with a plain needle and thread (like me!), its full of tips to make these easy peasy to make!

http://www.mommypotamus.com/diy-unpaper-towels-without-a-sewing-machine/

These really are great and they're so much better for the environment! We're using these around 50% of the time at the minute, as we're just finishing up our final (and last!) rolls of kitchen towel. They are perfect for spillages and so much more absorbent! So far we are definitely a fan of these. We currently have two rolls but I have purchased the material to make another two rolls, which is sitting on my sewing desk currently waiting, alongside a couple of other projects.

I would imagine you would need to remake a fresh set or two every 6-12 months, depending on how much you use them or how well they're looked after but when you compare this with how much you'd spend on disposable kitchen roll, you'd still make a substantial saving... plus they're prettier!

I hope you've found this helpful! Leave me a comment and let me know what you think of these and please subscribe to this blog :) x

What attachment parenting means to me

I'll admit, when I had my first baby, the thought of attachment parenting terrified me! I had this picture in my head of these amazing women who had their happy babies in their arms constantly, perfectly clean houses, well juggled lives who never ever lost their temper or needed a 5 minute breather to themselves. Whilst I know these types of women probably exist (kudos to you ladies!), it's not always a realistic image of what attachment parenting is, or rather what I find attachment parenting means!

When I had my babies I was really young, 18 for my first and 21 for my second and my well-meaning family felt the need to tell me how to do everything. Many aspects of attatchment parenting that I loved the look of or liked the idea of, I was (stupidly) talked out of. Obviously they meant well, but I was born in the early 90's where formula feeding and 'crying-it-out' seemed to be 'the way to parent'. I was constantly told various things such as "leave him to cry, he'll learn to become independent", "you'll make a rod for your back if you keep picking him up" and I quote "he needs a bottle of formula, that way he'll get the nutrients he needs, to grow some more hair". I have my lovely mother in law to thank for the latter as my little man was a baldy. Well, baldy and proud!

Getting to three months of breastfeeding with my first, was a massive and difficult achievement for me. We were having so much trouble with feeding, persistent thrush, reoccurring mastitis and tongue tie amongst these, and I was getting barely any support at home from family. I must admit my mother and husband were amazing throughout this!

By my second baby, I had become as stubborn as anything. I was going to breastfeed and babywear and do what I felt was best for my little one! This time, I did my own research and I knew what had worked for the first time.

Attachment parenting, or at least the concept of it, brought me to baby-wearing, cloth nappies and opened me up to the concept that my baby isn't just a crying, pooping, time-consuming little creature, but a little human being who knows nothing of the world. I had never really thought about how it must feel to be a baby, and I don't think many do, after all we don't remember these years. I can't imagine not understanding what's going on around me, not being able to communicate through words of any kind or not being able to do simple things such as eat, change and clean myself. It made me realise how being close to my baby is what she needs and how letting her 'lead' the way is so beneficial to her in terms of her independence.

Attachment parenting to me, means giving my baby everything I possibly can and everything she needs, in a way that suits her. It means cuddles at 3am when she's teething, over-tired or even just needing my warmth. It means carrying her in her sling next to my heart because its a familiar sound and it's the only place she will nap in the day. It means not letting her cry it out, because I can't bare the thought of her thinking I'm not there or that I don't always have her back.

It means what you take from it. Whether that be baby wearing, co-sleeping, breast-feeding into toddlerhood and beyond. I probably don't class as a die hard attachment parent (if that exists) but it has definitely opened me up to understanding my baby more and seeing everything from her point of view. This time around I've learnt to dismiss my family and friends telling me that I'm making a rod for my back... I'd rather that and a happy girl than a stressed and upset baby.

After all, they're only babies for a short time. The 3am cuddles don't last forever, and I certainly don't want to look back in years to come, wishing I held them for longer, cuddled them closer or studied their ever-changing features more often.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Leave me a comment below about what attachment parenting means to you, and how or if it has changed the way you think about parenting since discovering it!
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DIY Vest Extenders Using Old Vests

A couple of months ago I was sorting out my little girls old vests, wondering what I could do with them as it seemed such a shame to get rid of them. Then it occurred to me.. I could make some vest extenders with them! I had been looking for some to buy but they just seemed so expensive (especially when I included postage) for something which just extends a vest..

These vest extenders are relatively easy to make and if you cut carefully you still have a lot of the vest fabric left so I've also cut a lot out ready to make bunting for her room (although I've yet to get around to making it). Also you get prettier vest extenders from using old vests instead of boring white ones everyone tends to stock!

This is also really quick and only takes around 10-15 minutes for each vest extender.
I'm not a brilliant machinist by any stretch of the imagination but I found these quite easy. The picture below is my first attempt... so please excuse the slightly wonky seams and sewing! They are pretty self explanatory but I've added pictures of each stage to make it even easier to do.

 

What you will need:

1 old vest for every vest extender you want to make

Matching thread

Scissors

Pins

 

I start by cutting the three pieces I need, out of the vest and laying them flat on the table. You then need to figure out which way you need to sew the two bits of fabric with the snaps. I used another vest to help me with this, as it's really important that it all attaches to the right bits to work. For me it worked out to have the top snaps in the photo facing upwards and the outer snaps below, facing downwards.

 

 

Once I had figured this out, I pinned them together and started to sew a straight line down the them, sewing them together, which should look like this when done...

 

 

 

I have seen some vest extenders left like this but I didn't think it looked as neat so to hide seams and rough edges, I then stitched a 'back piece' onto the snaps pieces like this, along the black lines I have added... (I've cut this a bigger than needed, just so I could show this properly)

 

 

 

Trim any excess fabric off to create neater seams and then turn this inside out and tuck in the tops of the fabric, leaving the snaps exposed, and sew down

 

 

 

And you're done!

 

I apologise for the un-neat stitching in these photos! I was too busy focusing on getting the right pictures!

 

I've made a number of these in various sizes for different nappies, so longer ones for night nappies and shorter ones for when she goes up a size in vest and when she's wearing slimmer nappies. I love making these as they cost next to nothing and it's a brilliant way to reuse old vests that you no longer need. Also if you're like me and buy the same brand all the time, they are almost guaranteed to fit!

 

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A nappy review - Bambino Mio Miosolo

I'd known about reusable nappies from when I was much younger and my auntie was having her children. I remember seeing maidens of prefolds and wraps around the house when we'd visit, but I never really thought much of it until I had my second child.

I was first introduced to bambino mio after I purchased 'a starter pack' of two-parters (prefolds and wraps) at a baby event in my local supermarket and researched into the brand and what other types of nappies they do. A couple of days later I purchased some preloved miosolos off a site I found to try, as prefolds and wraps weren't working for us at the time, and I LOVED them!

I'd looked at a number of other brands before purchasing these and liked the look of them for a number of reasons but mostly it was the reviews and how many people were using them. The prints that they come in are soooo pretty! Even my 4 year old little boy wanted to wear them because he loved the patterns... luckily we settled for letting him pick what print his sister wears as it took MONTHS to potty train him and he is NOT going back into nappies now! As much as I'd love the excuse to double our stash and buy some more boyish prints!

At first I found they were a little too big for my little girl, who is quite slim and long, even on a smaller rise as she was only 4 months at the time, but looking back I think it's more that it took us a while to figure them out. How to get a good fit, getting the elastic snug around the legs and also knowing which rise we needed it on.

Now 4 and a half months on they're our go to nappy and we LOVE them.

The miosolo nappy is an all in one 'birth to potty' nappy and they come in many different prints and block colours. They are velcro fastened and have three rises on the front, allowing you to adjust the size of them to fit your little one. The insert tucks into the back, similar to a pocket nappy, which is brilliant as you can wash and pre-stuff them ready to use. I love this about them as my husband (who isn't so keen to use cloth) even finds these easy to use - they're fool proof! ... Well almost, the first time my husband put one of these on my daughter it was back to front - somehow!

The microfibre insert itself has a little pocket at the top to help you stuff it into the pocket of the nappy, which is brilliant, as not only does it make it 5x easier to stuff the nappy, it also serves as something to cover any jewellery, as I am terrified my wedding ring is going to somehow rip the PUL (paranoid I know). It also has a pull cord type of thing along the insert, to help you pull out the insert after use with minimal touching of the insert itself.

 

When washing, I have found that they tend to take a day to dry on an airier fully in the winter but in the summer they can take a couple of hours when the weather is nice and warm (which is never in the UK) so having a good stash is key if you're like me and only tend to wash every 3 days.

They can be quite pricey if brought at full price (around £15.99 normally), however they last, they wash brilliantly and are so pretty and cute when on the bum! Also you can often pick them up cheaper in on various websites running offers or even sometimes in local supermarkets in the UK. My local Aldi supermarket recently had them in their baby event for £7.99. Needless to say our stash grew by at least 5 nappies that week! I wanted more but my husband wouldn't let me - actually they sold out but he doesn't know that's the reason we didn't get any more ;)

Overall I do think these nappies are perfect for us! They're easy to use, come in lovely colours and just work really well on our little girl. They've won numerous awards in the UK and I can definitely see why! Plus they can fit my 4 year old, which goes to show they really are a birth-to-POTTY nappy and will last through the ages!

Thanks for reading and don't forget to subscribe for more nappy reviews and much more x

5 ways to use cloth nappies on a budget

When I first starting cloth-bumming, I was on maternity leave, earning much less than my normal wage and trying to save as much money as possible and I know many are also in a very similar situation. Cloth-bumming is often described as a way to save money and 'cheaper in the long run' and whilst all of these are true, I know many who have decided against cloth because of the initial cost.

If I'm honest, cloth-bumming wasn't an overnight revelation for us and it took us a good few months to build up our stash (which is still very small compared to some I've seen) and the same amount of time to have my little girl in these majority of the time. The picture below is about 80% of our stash (I have some more on the way - it's so addictive!)

 

Buy nappies preloved

A lot of my nappies have come from preloved sites including pages on facebook, and they are brilliant. This a perfect solution for if you're wanting to try as specific brand, as more often than not someone has one or two lying around which they don't use. Some of my Miosolos (bottom shelf) cost as little as £3-4 before postage which is a fraction of the cost to buy brand new which is normally around £15 depending on the site/shop.

Have a good look online for cheaper prices

Keep an eye out for offers as well. All of my new nappies have been bought on offer, as I just can't afford to pay the full price. For those in the UK, Tesco stock white Miosolos for £7 each on their website which is fab if you aren't too bothered by the print. My Totsbots were bought in an event on the makers page before Christmas, costing £8.50 each instead of the usual £16 (depending on site). I have also noticed many sites also have offers on depending on the time of year (black Friday, Christmas etc) which can usually get you a few ££'s off.

Some real nappy sites that I've seen also have their own 'preloved' sale pages where they sell off ex-display or also old prints that are no longer stocked.

Sign up to real nappy websites

Many websites give you a discount code for signing up to their website which can be anything up to 15%

Check your local supermarkets and baby shops

It seems cloth bumming is becoming more and more popular so it's also worth looking at baby events in your local supermarkets, as a lot are starting to stock real nappies lately. For example my local Morrison's in the town centre and the Waitrose in the next town all stock Miosolos. I haven't ever seen these for much less than retail price apart from one store, but it does save your postage costs from buying online.

Check with your local council for incentives

Many local councils in the UK run incentive schemes or money back schemes, which allow you to claim back some of the money from purchasing your nappies. These depend on your local council but it's definitely worth looking into. My local council give packs of two nappies or a £25 voucher if you spend £50 (including preloved nappies)

For those in the UK and looking into cloth nappies, there's LOTS of information, along with a list of local cloth nappy libraries where you can borrow and try different nappies to find what works for you on this website: http://www.goreal.org.uk/uk-cloth-nappy-library-network